Monday, January 9, 2017

BURNING PIRATE SHIPS CRASHED INTO MY HOUSE

Burning pirate ships crashed into my house and my house was all a sudden in flames and filled with flaming pirates who had great earrings but bad manners and ate all my cereal and poked holes in my toothpaste with their cutlasses and left every surface they sat on with a greasy sheen and I was getting a little shirty about it all but I figured what the hell, the house is gonna be burnt to the ground soon enough so I might as well just enjoy the pirate party. I put on an eyepatch and grabbed a bottle of rum and started pillaging myself.

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